– О чём молчит твой блог? – спросила меня Оксана.
Мне сразу представилась картинка: мой блог сидит себе, болтает ножками в кроссовках, рот на замок закрыл, ключик выбросил, а сам с любопытством смотрит за всем, что делается вокруг. И на меня хитро так посматривает – мол, что делать-то будешь без меня?.. Хорошенький такой, круглый, как солнышко или вот как масленичный блин.
А я смотрю на него и злюсь: о чём молчишь, сволочь? Чего заткнулся, а? Сказать нечего?
Никому он не скажет, что в папке моего ноута под названием «Идеи постов» – стотыщ файлов, в каждом из которых начаты полторы строки текста, или составлен обрывочный план поста, а то и просто набросаны несколько слов, которые, видимо, должны напомнить хозяйке канву придуманного текста. Занесешь руку над публикацией, чуть-чуть напишешь – и бросаешь, потому что ну скука же смертная – писать о том, о чём голова уже всё подумала и придумала. Кажется, что все вокруг это и без тебя давно знают, а ты, как наивная жена мужа-изменщика, узнала и сказала об этом последней.
Никому он не скажет и про стотыщ сомнений: вот тут достаточно ли внятно написала? А не отдает ли это стилем а-ля Капитан Очевидность? А как бы это сделать поприкольнее? Ой ну что-то нудно совсем… А это понятно ли будет людям? А не слишком ли я навертела?
Охохох. Что ж ты со мной делаешь, молчащий блог?..
Не расскажет он и про то, что многозадачность схватила тебя своими лапищами и тянет во все стороны: там у тебя подготовка клиента к переговорам, тут – внутрикорпоративный Клуб переговорщиков, здесь – тренинг по управлению продажами, а еще маркетинг с мерчендайзингом; одним – управленческое мастерство с самым актуальным уклоном, другим – управление изменениями в себе… А ещё своя собственная учёба (да, я наконец-то опять была студенткой целых 4 месяца, и даже красивый сертификат есть!), а еще сын отделился в почти самостоятельное плавание, а еще впервые я организовала проект для Сбербанка…
Промолчит мой солнечный блог и о том, что совсем скоро день рождения, и дата такая, прямо скажем, некрасивая…
Утаит он и засевшую в голове картинку, на которой я сбегаю в долгосрочный отпуск с огромным чемоданом денег. Барселона, привет! Мы скоро будем, слышишь?.. Невзирая на растущий евро, несмотря на старенький чемодан, наплевав на то, что финансовая ситуация бывает нестабильной, – мы приедем!
Промолчит он и о том, что я точно поняла – пока больше не хочу работать с детскими группами. Всё-таки взрослые профессионалы мне роднее, понятнее и милей.
Никогда не скажет он, что самые легкие и самые волшебные посты получаются из путешествий. Но последнее время – то Комсомольск, то Вяземский. Пища для вдохновения, прямо скажем, так себе. И, как сказал один хороший человек, пока не закрыли границу, хотелось бы глянуть на Ниццу.
Он утаит, что серьезные экспертные тексты часто идут с большим сопротивлением. То ли экспертности не хватает, то ли чего-то совсем для души… Легче всего идут те, что написаны в порыве счастья, удовольствия, хорошего настроения… Но он стесняется сказать, что к горлу подкатывают тошнотики от всех этих сетевых позитивчиков из серии #ялюблюсвоюработу или #давайвпереджги .
Он стиснет зубы и не будет рассказывать про свои обиды оттого, что люди убежали из твоего Телеграма потому, что ты слишком долго молчала. Обидно, да. Но и поделом. Всё справедливо.
Иногда он вообще психует, ложится, отворачивается к стенке и думает: все, меняю профессию нафиг, ухожу в пекари! Буду печь хачапури с сыром, катать тесто и думать о вечном, а не о какой-то там эффективности, вовлеченности, kpi и прочей ерунде.
И самое главное – он не скажет, чего ж он так долго молчал? Сам не знает. Сидит, болтает ножками и разводит ручками.
А я пошла и замочек нашла. Тот самый, который в самом начале поста выкинул.
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